MAY — aanhpi heritage + mental health awareness month
a vulnerable post for a vulnerable time:
I want to share a glimpse into my personal healing and liberation work, and what it’s been like to navigate my mental and overall health as someone who has experienced dissociation and body dysmorphia for much of her life; coming to terms with her neurodivergence later in life; been exposed to personal, relational, and collective crises and trauma; and trying to show up daily to the resistance and liberation of palesteen, anyways, the best I can.
intersections of my life, my identity that I continue to unpack, reckon with, crawl through the dark depths of in hopes of getting closer to the truth, my truth, of how I move with and inhabit this body.
rage, trauma, fear, grief— of my own, my ancestors, our ancestors, our collective now, aching, dying, fighting for liberation of palesteen and for all beings— are lodged inside nooks and crannies of my being— my head, my heart, my gut, my lungs; my jaw, ears, throat, shoulders, back, hips. I have frozen, collapsed, desired to flee many times. and there’s still my will to fight, growing stronger by the day.
simultaneously, my creative, curious, hopeful spirit, and joy continue to gently nestle their way in to hold, nurture, and cradle the rage, trauma, fear, and grief. reminders to move at the speed of trust within my own body.
how the parts of me, the ones I know and the ones I’m getting to know, come together in support of my whole. to help me align and connect deeper to my insides and my outsides.
this is how I know I belong, even though the colonial, white supremacist, capitalist machine attempts to convince me I am meant to be alone and isolated.
I met with one of my peer support mentors last week who validated for me that it’s a good thing I am actively experiencing this collective grief and rage, rather than distance from it; that it’s good to tune into humanity.
I need you, and we need each other to remind us of our shared humanity, our collective bodies and existence, to support the liberation and well-being of palesteen and of all living beings. 🍉🤍🇵🇸
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